There’s
a movement out there to try to get Mike Ditka
in the Illinois governor’s office in place of current enterprising governor
Rod Blagojevich.

Ditka’s qualifications, of course, are many. He’s got a career record of
121-95 as a head coach in the NFL. He seems like a fair-minded guy. He was
strongly considered as a candidate to run against Barack Obama for a U.S. Senate
seat in 2004. He’s got a fantastic mustache. From what I can tell, he’s fluent
in two languages, English and Emmitt.
And if it came to it, he could probably afford to buy the spot. I heard that
happens sometimes in Illinois.

The website, dagoverner.com, has this
message:

We da people of Illinois are sick and tired of scumbag politicians who think dat it’s their job to lie, cheat and steal. No more! We deserve somebody in charge who we can trust. Somebody who we can depend on. Somebody who we know understands the difference between right and wrong and won’t be afraid to kick corruption in the ass harder than da ‘85 Bears beat down da Patriots in da Super Bowl! 

Dat’s right, my friends. Da man for da job is Coach Ditka. So let’s make it happen! Ditka for Governor!!

It also has a lot of "Ditka for Governor" merchandise for sale.
It’s probably worth noting that Ditka’s said nothing himself about wanting to be
governor, and isn’t thought to be a serious candidate. Given that, one might
think that the primary purpose of the website would be to sell merchandise. But
I don’t think anyone would ever use the internet in a less-than-honest way.

Gracias, Critical
Fanatic.

We’ve had some fun with the not-so-many faces of Barry Zito this season, but I absolutely love this shot from the Giants’ holiday party on Wednesday. If the looks on the faces of Zito and these underprivileged kids don’t warm you up a bit, it’s probably time for a marathon session of It’s A Wonderful Life — or at least an exorcism of your inner seasick crocodile. 

While we’re on the topic of Christmas and charity, I’d like to point out that the situation over at Toys for Tots is not a good one this year. With the economy being the way it is, demand is up, but donations are down. Here in Chicago, they’re still about 250,000 toys away from what they handed out in 2007 and they’ll probably need even more. As such, I’m calling it an early day here on the Stew so that I can go out to Target before the storm arrives and help bolster the toy bins with as many toys as I can afford.

If you’re out shopping over the weekend, please consider throwing an extra item in your cart for someone out there who needs it. Everything must be new and no guns or stuffed animals will be accepted. If you’re busy and would simply make a donation, you can do that too. The Marines are then able to buy toys the tax-free route.

Remember: What we do today can make all the difference in the life of a child a week from now. Happy holidays, everyone!

Shortly after asking this young Russian McDonald’s worker to fetch him a Quarter Pounder value meal with a Diet Coke — easy on the ice — Rafael Furcal went running back to Burger King to see if they’d give him another Whopper like the one he had just finished. 

Said the McD’s worker: "I think you have to be upset with the turn of events. We don’t do business this way. You don’t expect people you have to deal with to do business this way."

Said a nearby bystander: "You know the old saying: Sometimes the best deals are the ones you thought you’d made but didn’t make because somebody weaseled out at the end." 

Said fellow Burger King patrons: "Welcome back?" 

Said Furcal: "I changed my mind. I didn’t want a Quarter Pounder. I wanted a Big Mac." 

Before the pageantry that was the Heisman Trophy presentation has a chance
to slip everyone’s mind, it might be a good idea to look at the three candidates
from an NFL perspective. Might one of them be the rare exception to the
"Win the Heisman, be worthless in the NFL" trend? 

Tim
Tebow: I think most people see Tebow as something other than a quarterback
in the NFL, and if he is a quarterback, he’s not one that’s going in the
first couple of rounds. His release is painfully slow. And if he does change
positions, given his dimensions and abilities, he’s probably looking at being a
tight end. And with that transition period, Tebow’s not likely to be taken in
the first couple of rounds at that position, either.

Of course, all this means he’s likely to be in school for another year, where
the "rah-rah, let’s go get ‘em, team!" style plays a little better.
But you never know. After last night, he could get a call from Andy Reid saying,
"We’re looking for someone to run that Tim Tebow play, and De’Sean Jackson
clearly isn’t that guy." Scouts are also said to be enamored by the fact
that he wears Crocs.

Sam Bradford: He could be the first quarterback taken in the draft if
he decides to come out. He’s got the size, accuracy and ability to make the
quick decisions that you’re looking for. He’s drawn some comparisons to Tom
Brady, and that’s a nice compliment and all, but it’s also insane when applied
to anyone who’s never played a down in the NFL.

He’s not a lock to go, but unless he has a couple of limbs severed in the
championship game against Florida, I’d say there’s not much reason for him to
stay in school. It’s not a deep quarterback class, and if he’s projected as a top-15 guy (and he likely would be), the money would be right for leaving.
Especially if there’s some kind of rookie wage scale in 2010, which is entirely
possible.

The downside for Bradford: He’s a quarterback who won the Heisman. That’s
never good.

Colt McCoy: He’s on record as saying he’d like to be a four-year starter
at Texas, and I don’t think the feedback he’ll get from NFL people will change
his mind and make him enter the draft. There are questions about his arm
strength. And while I feel like scouts pay way too much attention to arm
strength, they still do. And if that’s a question mark, you’re not going to be a
first-rounder.

Mel Kiper doesn’t have McCoy listed in his top-five junior quarterbacks, and
in a weak quarterback class, that’s not good, even if it’s early. McCoy would
probably have to blow people away at the combine to be a first- or second-round
pick.

Update: Coincidentally, Dr. Saturday asks why Tebow can’t make it as an NFL quarterback.