Born on a cold Chicago morning in early February, Big League Stew was the third blog to pop out of that magical YSB-chute. Now, after 11 months spent simmering, we look back at a year of ingredient gathering that took us from the spring sunshine of Florida and Arizona to the midtown madness of the All-Star Game to an October World Series in Philadelphia that featured end of days weather to close out our first full season. It was a fun year, to be sure, and thankfully another one is fast approaching. Whether you believe it or not, we’ll be uttering those spine-tingling words about pitchers and catchers before we know it.

Until then, your main Stewards — David Brown, Nick Friedell and myself — would like to thank you for your continued readership with a review of the year that was on the l’il baseball blog we’re proud to call home. Happy New Year, everyone.

Big League Stew’s Story of the Year — The Tampa Bay Rays take baseball and the baseball blogging world by storm

Coming into this gig, I knew that the Yankees and Cubs of the world would be the go-to teams when it came to blogging about baseball. What I couldn’t have anticipated was just how much we’d end up writing about a previously anonymous floormat from Florida.

Throughout their entire transformation from early-season curiosities to American League champions, the Rays were the pleasant surprises who brought us more blogworthy material than we could have ever expected. Their rise started during spring training, when they battled the Yankees, it continued during a debate over whether or not they should add Barry Bonds and then survived an explosion of hype that included no less than 267 tribute songs recorded in the Bay area by emerging "artists."

Meanwhile, the team’s manager searched the European continent for Rays fans, its head cheerleader swigged beer from the catcher’s athletic supporter and the Rookie of the Year third baseman said he was tired of being linked to pictures of a desperate housewife in almost every glass of Dave Brown’s Morning Juice. (He also said the first baseman didn’t seem that Dominican, which led to the Stew playing a role in its very first mini-controversy, even if it only played out on ESPN Deportes.)

Anyway, when the rising Rays were rewarded with things like out-of-control ALCS celebrations and salutes from strip clubs, it brought a little tear to our eye. Our little baby was all growed up and we no longer find it strange that the Rays occupy a large portion of our daily thoughts. May the new year bring them — and, by extension, us — more of the same. 

Honorable mentions: The Phillies became World (Deleted) Champions!; The saga of Jason Giambi’s mustache entertained a nation; Joba Chamberlain impersonation proved to be a profitable career; Mrs. Clemens and Mrs. Canseco compared boob jobs; We said goodbye to Yankee Stadium — Shea Stadium, too; Nick Friedell told a good story about Brandon "Taco" Phillips; The Cubs’ drought odometer hit triple digits; Some guy named Manny Ramirez caused a bit of a stir in Boston and Los Angeles; The beatification proceedings for Josh Hamilton began

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Best BLS video of the year — The Anti-Hip Bump Revolution

After writing the post that made me Public Enemy #1 to at least 3,000 unamused and unmoved Yahooligans, I took my courageous fight to ban the deadly hip bump to baseball’s All-Stars themselves. To their credit, Ryan Braun, Nate McLouth and Milton Bradley understood the tongue-in-cheek nature of my crusade and happily joined in the fun. Michael Young and Grady Sizemore, though? Unamused and unmoved, as well.

Honorable mention — The Road Trip That Made Milwaukee Famous

Back in July, the Stew traveled on an Independence Day weekend junket across the Illinois-Wisconsin border, complete with plenty of knockwurst, Gorman Thomas bobbleheads and REO Speedwagon tunes on the playlist. The six-minute featurette shown below is the net result. (Please pay special attention to the prophet young man predicting the acquisition of CC Sabathia just three days before the fat man showed up to lead the Brewers to their first postseason since ‘82.) 

Other videos the Stew savored: Mariah Carey threw out the worst first pitch in history; I compiled an "Orel" History of the Dodgers’ Baseball Boogie; The ‘81 Dodgers sang "We Are The Champions"; Noted Phillies fan taught us all how to love; ORIOLES MAGIC!

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The Best of BLS Satire and Mischief — Why the Kansas City Royals shouldn’t sign Barry Bonds

Regular Stewies know that our crew is usually located somewhere between drunk circus clowns and gassy newborns when it comes to being serious. That type of approach can make for some entertaining passages, the best of which came in this end-of-days-prediction from guest writer Baron Von Snakin during our Barry Bonds Job Watch series.   

"Here’s how it goes: The Royals sign Bonds (probably for a case of Wal-Mart gift cards). People are intrigued, and Kauffman Stadium fills past half-capacity. Lines begin to form for beer, barbecue, and the bathroom. Fans get cranky. Prices go up. Fans get crankier. Some jackass sneaks a kayak into the right field fountain, hoping to fish out a piece of history. Said jackass is electrocuted and every second of the gruesome affair is displayed on the world’s largest HD scoreboard. Every child in the stadium is traumatized by the remarkably clear image and pungent aroma of boiling flesh. Fueled by the trauma, these children immediately grow into confused, angry adults, afraid of water and kayaks and cotton candy. They form violent street gangs, borders dissolve, and our once peaceful region settles into a constant state of war … And that’s just the first week."

Honorable mentions: ‘Duk proposed World Series move to Wrigley Field; DB detailed 10 things that CC Sabathia and Derek Jeter may have talked about

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The Best of Baseball Media

It can be argued that we wouldn’t even have baseball blogs were it not for the goofs and gaffes of the TV folks who cover the daily grind. Here are a few of our favorite quotes that found a space on the Stew this year.

Rick Sutcliffe on Erin Andrews’ wardrobe selection: "Well, I’m more worried about Erin, than I was me. Wearing that skirt tonight in the Windy City? You think all eyes weren’t on her during batting practice?"

Reds’ announcer Franchester Brennaman on Cubs fans: "There are balls coming from all over the place. Left field, center field, right field. … See, this is the kind of thing, quite honestly right now, that makes you want to see this Chicago Cubs team lose. .. [F]ar and away, the most obnoxious fans in baseball, in this league, are those who follow this team right here. … You simply root against them. I’ve said all winter — they talk about this team winning the division — and my comment is, they won’t win it because, at the end of the day, they still are the Chicago Cubs, and they will figure out a way to screw this whole thing up."

Jeff Kent on legendary Dodgers’ announcer Vin Scully: "Vin Scully talks too much … I’ve been here four years and I have never seen Vin Scully down here in the clubhouse. How does Vin Scully know me? How does Vin Scully know Derek Lowe?"

TBS exec Jeff Gregor on FrankTV ads: "This is just a hypothesis on my side: You think there are a lot of (FrankTV) spots, but there’s actually not as many as you think," Gregor said. "They’re just so good at entertaining and engaging that when they come on you feel like you just saw one not too long ago."

Honorable sports media mentions: Dennis Eckersley hates when you call his haircut a mullet; Hawk Harrelson blames White Sox woes in Metrodome on sound waves; YES Network reminds Terry Crowley he’s still lucky to be in "bleepin" baseball; Mike Blowers puts the Curse of the Rally Fries upon the Mariners

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BLS listicle of the year — The Dick Trickle All-Stars: Baseball players with NASCAR names

If we learned anything in creating a 44-driver lineup for our inaugural Hank Aaron 755, it was that some people just don’t have a sense of humor and/or irony. I mean, if you can’t crack a smile when imagining Buddy Carlyle or Aaron Boone trading a cap for a helmet and running behind 750 horses while wearing eye black and a pair of cleats …

Honorable mentions: Derek Jeter did his best Tony Stark impression, dating 6 of Maxim’s Hot 100; Jon Lester pitched a no-no and joined our list of baseball’s All-Star cancer survivors a.k.a. "The John Kruk All-Stars"; Chas. Hustle and Ray Fosse beat out ol’ Teddy Ballgame in our Most Memorable Memory: ASG Edition tourney; Alfonso Soriano’s bunnyhop business puts him in line to join the list of the stupidest on-field injuries in sports history 

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The Best of Fashion Ump

From the gruesome ("Cleric" Gagne’s beard and Giambi’s golden thong) to the offensive (Chief Wahoo in stars-n-stripes and Wrigleyville’s ‘Horry Kow’ shirts) to the simply awesome (Elmer Fudd caps and Toronto’s powder blues), Fashion Ump was always there to offer a ruling. 

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The Best of Answer Man

After braving the periils of the clubhouse to find out the answers to our most pressing questions — Has Cole Hamels ever smoked a cigarette? Does CC Sabathia ever read The Onion? — our own Dave Brown produced some of the Stew’s best journalism with his unparalleled Answer Man sessions. A detailed rundown of his most memorable run-ins and exchanges can be found in his just-published Best of Answer Man post.   

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The Best of BLS photoshoppin’ — The BLS Postseason Bid Acceptance Speech series

Twenty-three times in 2008, Christmas came early to Big League Stew in the form of Answer Man, a unique Q&A in which the reader cannot reasonably expect what will be asked or answered. No topic is taboo. No question is too silly. No answer is too unresponsive. Hopefully, it all adds up to funny. Here are my favorite interviews from the past year, complete with a key back-and-forth from said session: 

1. Andy Van Slyke (May 1) Perhaps the closest that Answer Man could ever come to "Frost/Nixon," this interview made some laugh, others cry and even broke some news, or at least regurgitated it from a Jeff Pearlman book. Van Slyke performed at an All-Star level with hard-nosed panache and he’s always interviewed the same way, even now, as a Tigers coach.

The highest of the highlights: we rediscovered Van Slyke’s take on the Sid Bream Slide in the 1992 NLCS, and also what it felt like to bop teammate Barry Bonds in the face. Not to overstate its importance, but Van Slyke’s Answer Man probably was the high point of both the Tigers and Pirates respective seasons. Yes, they were that lousy.

Q: How did you feel after punching Barry in the nose?

AVS: Punch him in the nose? Did I punch him in the nose?

Q: I read it in a Jeff Pearlman book (called "Love Me, Hate Me: Barry Bonds and the Making of an Antihero" — P. 94).

AVS: We had an argument once, yeah. It was the best thing that could have happened to our working relationship. After that, we understood each other and got along much better. I always respected Barry Bonds, and I wanted to let him know that I did in a certain way.

Q: Did he have it coming?

AVS: A lot of times, people outside of locker rooms don’t understand that some things that happen there make it a completely different work environment from anything else out there. Outside of baseball, a lot of people in different environment say, "You should never let something like that happen, regardless." In baseball, things happen that are timely and necessary.

Q: If the Tigers ever were to sign him, would you give him a big hug?

AVS: Absolutely. And I would tell him to hit 30 home runs — or else I’ll punch him [laughs].

* * *

2. CC Sabathia (July 31) In a less-cynical era, before he took $700 billion from the federal government $160 million from the Yankees, Sabathia waxed poetically about the dots in (or out of) his name, his invisible friend (Danny) and what it might take for the Brewers to keep him in Milwaukee. Turns out sixth man on the Bucks couldn’t quite cut it.

Q: Did you see the Onion article about you and Fresh Prince Fielder?

CC: [Shaking head].

Q: You know the Onion, the satirical newspaper that does funny stories?

CC: No, I haven’t seen it.

Q: OK [scrambling]. I think the headline went something like, ‘CC Sabathia, Prince Fielder Keep Imagining Each Other aAs Giant Hamburger, Hot Dog, Respectively.’

CC: Ha! That’s good! I mean, we’re big guys and always going to be big guys. Nothing really offends me and I’m not really bothered by it. You take it in stride and laugh if it’s funny.

* * *

3. Mike Mussina (Aug. 7) Phew! I got Mussina under the wire just before he retired. One of the final few hundred interviews ever conducted at old Yankee Stadium, this session tried to utilize Mussina’s "different" sense of humor, while getting to the nuts and bolts of life in the Bronx.

Q: Since you signed with NY, and moved here during baseball seasons, how much more have you asked yourself, "What’s that smell?"

MM: Not since I moved here [laughs]. But as a visiting player, every time I’d enter the subway to go anywhere in the city, you have to ask yourself that very question. And, depending on the level that the train is — how deep you have to go — the smells are a little bit different.

Q: What do you think the smells are?

MM: I have no idea and I don’t want to know. The No. 7 Train going to Shea smells different than the No. 4 train, from Grand Central, going to Yankee Stadium.

* * *

4. Zack Greinke (June 20) If Answer Man had a kid brother, he would be Greinke. Funny, well-meaning and smarter than people give him credit for, Greinke’s oddball answers to Answer Man’s kooky questions created a perfect storm of sorts.

Q: You were once called "the future of pitching." Tell me, are we going to have flying cars in the future?

ZG: Yeah, we are.

Q: When?

ZG: Probably not too far away. About 10 years. That’s my guess.

Q: OK! I can hold out for 10 years.

ZG: Actually, probably longer than that.

Q: But, you said…

ZG: There definitely will be flying cars, but whether there’ll be flying cars for most people to use, it’ll probably take a long time to straighten everything out, all the rules and hassles. It’ll take a while to figure out how to keep people from crashing into each other.

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5. Hunter Pence (April 20) The very first Answer Man set the mood perfectly. It detailed why Pence crashed through a clear glass door during spring training and his virtual participation the often-misunderstood computer universe of World of Warcraft. Pence paid Answer Man a big compliment when he said, "These are interesting questions. I’ve never had an interview like this."

Q: As a precaution, are you never going to again wash a window?

HP: Um, I’m never going to run where there’s a glass sliding door. I’m going to walk.

Q: And look. Were you looking?

HP: I don’t … I really just … It happened so fast, like a quick decision to turn. I think I was looking. It’s not that I washed it — it was a brand new townhouse, so maybe they washed it — but someone else had shut the door without me looking, so in my brain it was open. … You know what’s amazing about it? How many people have told me they’ve done the same thing, but they didn’t fall through, they just bounced off it. I’m the only one that’s crazy enough to be running.

* * *

6. Huston Street (July 10) Also a budding guitarist, Street lost his job as A’s closer soon after this interview. The signs of struggle were apparent; teammate Andrew Brown needed to help Street out a little.

Q: Where are you in your musical evolution?

HS: I’m like a third-grader. I think I can say my A-B-C’s; I know most of the chords.

Andrew Brown: What kind of third-grader were you? That’s a low third grade. Is that a home school third grade?

HS: It’s a metaphor, Andrew!

Andrew Brown: When I was in third grade, we were doing multiplication tables, stuff like that.

* * *

7. Bert Blyleven (May 22) One word says it all: gas.

Q: Speaking of pride, what about this T-shirt you’ve been photographed wearing that says, "I [heart] to fart"?

BB: I LOVE to fart.

Q: What’s wrong with you?

BB: I’m honest. Have you ever farted?

Q: One or two times.

BB: And did it feel good?

Q: Always.

BB: Probably so. That’s why I wore it. I love to fart. I do. When the time is right, I do it. I’m not going to hide it.

Q: You’re so blunt about your love for flatulence.

BB: Yeah. Well, someone gave me the shirt because of my history of farting, so I wear it. I LOVE to fart. I think I still have it.

* * *

8. Cole Hamels (Aug. 22) Before being draped in World Series MVP glory, Hamels was stalked by a pink ape and was widely considered to be the less-good-looking half of his marriage.

Q: Has Cole Hamels ever smoked a whole pack of Camels?

CH: No. I think I smoked one cigarette in my life and I hated every minute of it. I’m glad I tried it, and I think it’s definitely something that’s not for me.

Q: When was this cigarette?

CH: Well, I was out underage-drinking (laughs).

Q: Any other crimes you committed that you’d like to admit to?

CH: No! I mean, I think all kids have done it at some point.

* * *

9. Francisco Rodriguez (Sept. 11) On his way to the single-season save record and a $37-million deal with the Mr. Mets, K-Rod recalled a time long ago when he didn’t have enough money to afford a real glove. No matter to Answer Man, who can find humor even in poverty. (Shame, Answer Man, shame!)

Q: Is it true that your first glove was a milk carton?

FR: That is totally true.

Q: How long until it wore out?

FR: It would wear out quick; it would maybe last two or three games.

Q: Did you catch better with chocolate milk, or regular?

FR: I think it was regular milk.

Q: What would you have done if your family got its milk in bottles?

FR: Would have used my bare hand. I remember my second glove — after the ones I made with the milk cartons — was given to me from Carlos Subero, who’s now the Double-A manager with the White Sox. He’d give me gloves and shoes.

* * *

10. Milton Bradley (July 24) Whoever gets him on the free-agent market will have an edge in the domino olympics. Beyond that, Bradley’s new team will get a player with a misleading reputation.

Q: Jeffrey Hammonds told you in an orientation that basically players will get a label and it sticks to them forever. What does your label say?"

MB: "Contents in package are not as they appear" [laughs].

Q: Does your label have an expiration date? You can’t scratch off this label, like on a beer bottle?

MB: Probably not. It’s there.

Q: So, if your label is misleading or wrong, what actually are your ingredients?

MB: I definitely got some cayenne pepper. Sugar. Everything has high fructose corn syrup in it. Distilled water, maybe, I don’t know.

* * *

2008 Answer Men (and Woman):
• Hunter Pence — April 10 • Justin Morneau — April 17 • David Wright — April 24 • Erin Andrews — April 25 • Andy Van Slyke — May 1 • Derek Jeter — May 8 • Bob Uecker — May 15 • Bert Blyleven — May 22 • Torii Hunter — May 29 • Joba Chamberlain — June 3 • Larry Bowa — June 13 • Zack Greinke — June 20 • Kerry Wood — June 26 • Huston Street — July 10 • Josh Hamilton — July 15 • Milton Bradley — July 24 • CC Sabathia — July 31 • Mike Mussina — Aug. 7 • Jason Bay — Aug. 14 • Cole Hamels — Aug. 22 • Ron Santo — Aug. 28 • Francisco Rodriguez — Sept. 11 • Ryan Dempster — Sept. 18 • Evan Longoria — Oct. 2

Like the rest of the blogosphere, I’m heading out for a few days of Christmas cheer and won’t be back on a regular schedule until Dec. 29, when we unveil a few "Best of BLS" posts.* 

Until then, enjoy this picture of our favorite Morning Juicer with ol’ Kris Kringle.

Have a safe and joyous holiday!

*Of course, that doesn’t mean we won’t have a post here or there should
news or circumstances call for one. It just means I’ll most likely be
too busy eating my grandmother’s fried shrimp and pierogis on Christmas Eve or my
mother’s turkey on Christmas Day or drinking beer at the Flyers-Blackhawks game on Dec. 26 or rocking out with My Morning Jacket on Dec. 27 to actually format and write any
legible posts about baseball. 

BLS NEWSFLASH! It’s being reported that the long Mark Teixeira Derby is finally over and that the winners of the first baseman’s services are the New York Yankees.

Big League Stew would like to extend congratulations to both parties. We now return you to your regularly scheduled holiday festivities. 

Wait a minute … Teixeira to the Yankees? 

The same Yankees that just committed $240 million to just two pitchers — CC Sabathia and A.J. Burnett — earlier this offseason?

The same Yankees who were linked to Teixeira during the hot stove season about as often as Miami and snow? 

The same Yankees that some of us thought would strike out during their pursuit of each free agents?

Yup, those Yankees.

(Didn’t I tell you their generosity knew no bounds?)

Since we all spent this morning assuming he was heading to Fenway to
join the Red Sox, I think we can deem this an absolute stunner. The first contract numbers being floated are a mind-boggling eight years for $180 million and Teixeira won’t even have to play for the Orioles or Nationals to cash that paycheck.

I’m sure many of you out there are already busy typing in your anti-Yankee comments, but the second suitor and soap opera nature of this story should provide for a season’s worth of entertainment along the Boston-New York corridor.

Let the respective griping and gloating commence. 

No word if either of the Steinbrenner Bros. were recently visited by someone doing his best Jacob Marley impression, but the Yankees sure are being generous as we near Christmas Day.

First it was announced that the Yankees will be writing a $26.9 million luxury tax penalty check to be distributed among the rest of the league’s teams (save the Tigers, who were also penalized to the tune of $1.3 million).

Now comes news that the club will be charging 1923 prices for some seats to the first two exhibition games against the Cubs in new Yankee Stadium on April 3-4.

If you want to sit in the bleachers, it’ll cost you a nice shiny quarter. If you’d like to sit in the grandstand, it’ll set you back $1.10. Both amounts were what it would have cost you to see the opening of old Yankee Stadium 85 years ago had you actually been alive in 1923.

The stadium’s other seats are being offered at reduced prices (they’ll top out at $50) and the team’s full-season ticketholders won’t be paying anything for admission to either game. With Prohibition over, beer will presumably be offered at this grand opening (albeit for a little more than it would’ve cost at a Bronx speakeasy back in the day).

But before we get a little too busy fawning over the glad tidings of the newly-changed Scrooge, remember this: These same seats getting offered for free or 25 cents on April 3-4 will cost as much as $2,500 for the first official game, an April 16 date against the Indians.

And considering that the park has been publicly financed, the ‘23 prices are a little closer to a small stocking stuffer than the big-ticket present under the tree.